10/9/16 broke

I think he's g@y tho.....

2:46 AMAlaina

I think he's g@y though... even tho I haven't confirm it 100 percent, he seems to treat everyone.. every girl sooo nicely..I want to say that I was jealous, but now that I  think about it.. no straight guy have ever been this nice to me..but why would he be the exception.. he's too nice.. so he's prob.. ya know.. not that there's anything wrong with his sexuality.. But why.. Do I always have the wrong feelings for the wrong guys..

I don't know how to fall in love with the right guy, I never really met any guy that I could have a conversation with..except him.. he's such a sweet talker...and I fell for it. But my six senses are telling me that these feelings again are false.. that how can someone this perfect be without a girlfriend.. So as I try to make sense of it.... I've kinda figured out the answer... It's not hard to believe... I just need to accept reality for what it is. However, I am still grateful to have met such a nice and dorky person...I do wish him the best.. I have finally decided on when to resign.. like I've long been wanting to .. but I was just giving it a bit more time to see how things would turn out.. I had that tiny bit of hope inside me that maybe.. maybe I've finally found someone that I could fall for... that the feeling I was feeling was right.. I've had too many false feelings on crushes that never turned out to be anything.. but now that I've made the conclusion that he likes...guys. Then that be it :). What's meant to be will be.. tho my heart aches too much as I write this.. He's done too many things that gave me false hope, I am just a bit under-experienced and confuse those actions with.. love. O wells, you learn as you go on in life.

To sum up (whilst listening to the sounds of rain tears), I broke my own heart with the whole scenario made up in my own mind, way to go, self. . . . . .

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